The Lord is my Shepherd

For a couple of weeks I have been focusing on Psalm 23 . Actually I had the boys memorizing it, and I kind of felt God leading me to this passage for my own personal Bible study. For some reason I felt that the first two verses were what He wanted me to concentrate on. Somehow the idea that God is my shepherd and that He is going to make me lay down in green pastures , and lead me beside still waters is extremely appealing. The first part of verse two is what I really feel drawn to though, HE RESTORES MY SOUL,,,, taken literally he will fill it up again, put back what has been taken out, . Wow! Then yesterday at church the sermon was on the Lord is a shepherd and of course the pastor used Psalm 23 to explain this concept. I actually missed most of the service but Brian was able to hear the sermon and I think it was a good way for us to both be on the same page spiritually. I kind of had been sharing what God was teaching me with Brian. I think now Brian is really open to the idea that maybe God is using this verse to lead our family for a season. Not sure what is going on exactly, but I will have faith in HIM who knows best. Meanwhile I am going to spend some time laying down in the grass and walking beside still waters. And allowing HIM to restore my soul. Selah

Praising in the Storm pt 2

Well I found my wallet ! Praise God... it was in the van, the same place I had looked several times before.
Josh is stilll sick, I hate to see him so down and not feeling good. Luke was sick/ is sick, but he is still toddling around causing as much mischief as he can. He just has thrown up several times today and is sleeping more than usual.
At one point today I actually said a little prayer of thanks to God for allowing me to minister to these little ones. They are so precious and sweet and God said the kingdom of heaven belongs to them ( or those who become like them....too tired to think of the actual verse ) .. Anyways they are precious in HIS sight, and he chose lil o' me to take care of them and hopefully make them feel better and nurse them back to health. So instead of being stressed, annoyed and disgusted at the fact that my 3yr old and 16 month old do not understand the concept of throwing up in a toilet or trash can, and that my pile of laundry has grown exponentially thanks to the aforementioned fact, I can still thank HIM for giving these little ones to me to take care of. I love my kids despite what they may hurl at me ( literally) and God loves ME despite all the crazy stuff I throw at HIM.

Well I have co op tomorrow . I really need to think of some activities, but for now I think I will get some sleep.

Praising in the STorm

We seem to be under attack lately with a constant ever changing line of illnesses, and injuries which seems to be effecting everyone in the family. I thought Brian was going to be laid off,, but now its looking like he might not. He has work until at least April 10th now. People think I am crazy but I really wanted to have my husband out of that environment. Its seems ludacris to quit when he doesn' t have any other options. Yet we both know that his present circumstances are not where God wants him. Praise God for a well paying job, and a husband who loves his family enough to want to leave the job to do God's work.
Also Ben has had some issues with a possible kidney problem. It may be nothing but then again no one is totally sure. The upside is that Ben has had some quality time with his mom and dad without little siblings around. Even if its just hanging out in the dr's office watching animal planet or me telling him Barry and George stories at 3 am in the ER... , he LOVES the undivided attention from Brian and me. Praise God for quality time with my son!
Now Josh is sick and we are praying for God' s healing and a quick recovery. And to add to the fun, I lost my wallet yesterday. My wallet with my driver's license, social security card, credit cards, AAA card, Books A Million card, Clay Center Membership, Columbus Zoo membership... plus all of my business cards, gift cards.... auughh Please Lord let me find it safe and sound.
Despite all of this I will praise God!!! He will do something good out of this, even if its a hard lesson for me to learn. You are good God, help me to see it come what may in the future.

Changing Seasons

kind of ironic, I just realized that Brian's last day of the work ( this Friday ) will be the last day of winter. ( unless I have my dates mixed up, I can never remember exactly what date the seasons change... oh well) . Ending of one season and beginning of another. This has not been a bad winter as far as winters go. Still its been cold, and depressing, and without much sunshine. Lord willing we are ending a period where the family has been missing a vital link for quite some time now. A vital link that brings us smiles and laughters, and fun times. Somehow we seem complete when Brian is with us.
Spring will bring sunshine, flowers blooming, and new life being breathed into the earth. Lord willing we will bring new life to our family. We will need to pray even more often, , be more compassionate and merciful to everyone, and definitely work on encouraging others with our mouths instead of bringing others down. Maybe now we can have a chance to seek God's will wholeheartedly instead of just short prayers for God to bless us as Brian heads off to work.
I know working 60 hrs weeks on average is not that huge of a deal, but for us its been hard. I am thankful he has had a job that pays so well, and that we could pay off a little of our debt. It was also nice to be able to pay for the PE classes at the YMCA, the ice skating lessons, and all the other activities which the boys needed to keep them busy. I just really believe that God wants Brian to spend more time with his sons and me. Little boys need their daddy to teach them , and love them, and show them what it means to be a Godly man.

There is good and bad in any season, it really is just a matter of being thankful and being diligent enough to look for the good things. And then remembering to continually thank God for the blessings He has bestowed.

Luck of the Irish

ok, my post has absolutely nothing to do with the luck of the Irish ( at least I don't think so) .. but it sounded like a cool title.. so I figured hey why not. I can't use my other favorite St Patty's day greeting since I am married now. Kiss me I' m Irish was always so much fun , especially since I was Irish and I do like kisses ( at least from some people). I always remember Valentine's Day 1996, I wore a big t shirt that said Kiss me I'm Irish on it. I told everyone that if it worked ( ie some guy actually kissed me ) then I would actually have a date for next Valentine's Day. Well two of my guy friends did kiss my hand ( very chivalrous type thing really :) ) . Next Valentine's Day though was mine and Brian's first official "date" I guess, at least it was when we were out together as a couple for the first time. I don't remember what I got Brian but he gave me a stuffed Scottish Terrier that I named Buford. It was very sweet. I wonder what happenend to Buford , I think my crazy kids got a hold of it a few years ago. Valentine's Day 1998 of course Brian and I were married.... not sure the shirt had anything to do with it, still it really was a cool , fun shirt to wear ... . Randome thoughts tonight I guess. trips down memory lane are fun every once in a while. Well I will try blog about the other stuff I was going to relate. For now I need to put some sleeping kids in their own beds.

Valentine's Day

Its Valentine's Day and my 11th anniversary and there is basically no hope of spending time with my dh. I am so drained from three kids Valentine Parties this week. The biggest one was a t the co op, and I planned a lot of it. We ended up with 62 people I think. It was crazy, but I think everyone had fun. Mentally I was exhausted, and I have not completely recovered. Plus the fact that dh worked a lot of overtime. I thought since the overtime seems to be done for a while that we could do some work around the house. Dh is thinking more like where can we go to have fun, and basically stay out of the house. There are so many things that need done, but when do we have a chance to do them? I truly love planning homeschool stuff, and I have tons of ideas for stuff to do, I just wish we could have some extended quality time , just our family. Whenever we do have time that is unscheduled, we always end up just goofing off and not doing anything productive anyways. Like today , we arrived home at around 4:00 from the last Valentines Day Party. The boys just played silly games on the computer, and Brian and I just took a nap on the couch. So here it is Saturday night, I have not done laundry for church tomorrow, plus since Gabe dumped the laundry detergent, I can't do laundry anyway. I didn't make it to the grocery store, and I promised I would cook dinner for my mom's family tomorrow as a birthday present to her. I know this is just a big gripe session but its better to gripe here than to gripe at my family. I know when I am so tired I am not always reasonable.

Tomorrow I will blog about God's love, and how he is the ultimate lover of our soul, and how he can be the perfect husband etc,,,, I will thank Him and Praise Him for all the wonderful gifts he showers me with every day of my life. I will rave about how He is the ultimate Valentine... but for now I just need to throw all the negative emotions and thoughts out of my mind and my thoughts. Writing seems to be one way to get things off of my chest.

I am also nutritionally deprived... I need my shakes. One day this week I managed to take the equivalent of like 4 shakes. God must have know I was going to need the extra stuff, I only had like three hours of sleep that night thanks to Luke. I should have been a wreck the next day, but I managed. I was a little tired, but I could function with some degree of stability. I even managed to get all four boys to a Valentines Day party five minutes before it started, ( and I even had my food offering too). Well some boys are still up and not behaving, so I better get them to sleep so I can get some sleep too.

Waiting to exhale

We just returned last night from a vacation to Daytona Beach Florida. It was so great. Soaking up the sun, letting the boys play around in the sand and ocean, it was a most peaceful experience. Brian and I and the boys were more relaxed than we had been in a very long time. It was such a gift from God! God helped us out in so many ways. We actually had a chance to relax and talk, without outside pressures interfering or pulling on us. Brian also said that he is going to find a way to spend more time with the boys. We are not sure how it will work out but we know that little boys need to learn how to be men, and surprise surprise they need men to teach them that. Having Brian working outside the home 50 -60 hrs a week, and then take on side jobs, and help everybody and their uncle out with problems does not leave a lot of room for quality time with his boys. We are just praying for God to give us some clear guidance on how to do it. I don't know how long it will last, but right now so much of my anger , depression and frustration are changed into positive emotions of thankfulness, and just love for the people God has put around me. Its like a huge weight has been lifted from me, and I can hope and dream again. I watched the movie Hope Floats a number of years ago. I didn't understand the title for a long time. After reflection though, I think it was just a commentary on the fact that no matter how much bad stuff you go through, hope keeps re surfacing and pushing its way to the top. Lord willing hope will persevere and give bloom to a beautiful flower of dreams, and fulfillment of God's purpose.